2009 has been an interesting year to say the least, a large number of changes has come about. Most of which spawing from really one clear decision and one set of goals made at the end of the pervious year. Not so much a resolution, but me coming to terms with my shortcomings at the time.
Lately I have felt defeated, a weight on my chest still remains. I try to live a life of no regrets, yet I find myself asking questions about past events. Would I do something different? Would I have handeled things differently? What would have been the outcome if...
I found myself back in a rut, I came all the way here and yet I still am doing nothing that I desired. Don't get me wrong, it does take some time to get to a place where you can be happy with both yourself and with your situation. I am doing well for myself in terms of money, my health isn't terrible but could use work, and I have a network of good friends that I both love and respect even though most don't feel that I do. Yet I find myself burdened with questions about my past self (selves), which is effecting my current self, and will no doubt effect my future self and my long term goals.
I have a dream, friends; I have a goal that no matter what needs to be seen to the end. That is why as we move into a new year I prepare to make my stand. You might be asking yourself, just what is "Operation Restart?" What the hell is this guy rambling on about? Why am I reading this? "Operation Restart" is just what the name suggests, taking what I have learned from the past year, the growth I have achieved and using that to start my life from a new point. To throw away, or purge that which is not needed. To take what is positive about my current state in life, and use that as a foundation to create a new life. Its something that really anyone can do.
You who are reading this may be infact at a point in your life where you are at a crossroad, or at a dead end, or at a roadblock, or even starting a new path in life. At times like these, events that are unfolding can be overwhelming. At times you may even feel that just giving into you fears, your doubts, and just exisitng would be the easiest and best choice. You are wrong! You have tools at your disposal which you can use. Use them! You have experiences in your life both painful, and happy. You have a strength that only you are aware of. You may not realize it, but you do have people around you that love and support you! And lastly, you are alive! No goal comes without hard work and sacrifice!
2009 comes to a close, and with it comes the end of another chapter in our lives. 2010 brings an air of change for those willing to accept it, gather your tools and join me this year as we move towards change. If you are at a crossroad in your life, its time to start walking down a path. If you are at a dead end then turn around, retrace your steps and find a new path. If you are lead to a roadblock just walk around it, if there are no means to do so then push right on through. If you find you can't run anymore, then walk, if you can't walk then crawl, and if you can't crawl then you find someone to help carry you the rest of the way. You are never alone!
The New Year starts now, gather your courage and make a change!